Christmas Eve: a time known by many as the night that Santa Claus visits each children’s household to deposit gifts. These gifts (besides coal) are appreciated, the reindeer are held in high esteem, and his general presence is encouraged…but not by The Taylors. Of course, it’s impossible to sue an imaginary man (apologies to any believers), but in a hilarious letter published by Metal Hammer, Corey Taylor and co. can sure try!
The letter concerns Santa’s yearly visit, but it’s written as if such a visit was uncalled for and, furthermore, illegal. Brilliant lines such as: “Your admission of entrance into The Plaintiffs’ property at [ADDRESS REDACTED] through the chimney is a perplexing one, seeing as 1) you had no right to be there and 2) the chimney itself is fake and offers no access to the home therein” and more can be found here.